Taking a Biblical Perspective on a Toxic Marriage
It can be hard for a Christian to open up about being involved in a toxic marriage because there is a lot of confusion about what God expects from our marriages. Many people quietly stay trapped in unhealthy marriages and wonder if God will frown upon them if they leave. The truth is that God doesn’t want us to hurt each other or suffer in silence. The Bible condemns toxic behavior in marriage such as: Emotional, verbal, or physical abuse Love does no wrong to a neighbor; therefore, Love is the fulfillment of the law. – Romans 13:10, NASB The Bible is clearly against us physically harming or abusing each other. The Scripture is full of verses that condemn violence, which is constantly associated with wickedness and described as detestable to the Lord. Jesus calls us to relationships of peace and harmony, so we are expected to resist using violence even in retaliation for violence used against us (Luke 6:29). This does not mean that we should be content to suffer the abuse in silence; instead, we should know that violence and abuse are not God’s plan for us. There is no shame or sin in seeking safety and help. Manipulative behavior Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility, count others more significant than yourselves. – Philippians 2:3-4, ESV Manipulators try to control or influence their partner’s behavior, usually through deceptive or emotionally abusive behavior. This can include psychological or spiritual abuse and emotional manipulation in the form of threats, unnecessary ultimatums, restricting one’s movements, or isolating them. The Bible helps us understand the difference between healthy and unhealthy control and recognize signs of toxicity in our marriage. The word of God can help us to develop a strong sense of self-esteem and identity in Christ [...]