Infidelity and Affairs

The bond that allows for a relationship to flourish is trust. Trust takes time to develop, as two people experience each other in different settings and gradually come to see that they are reliable in ways that matter. That trust enables the relationship to deepen because it allows people to be vulnerable with each other and be honest at the risk of rejection. Over time, the relationship deepens, and the bond shared gets stronger, which is one reason why adultery is so terrible. When infidelity occurs, it strikes at the trust that has been built over many months or years. It can make one question whether the relationship was real to begin with, and if there is a future for the relationship. This is to say nothing of the deep hurt it causes because of the betrayal and all it implies. When infidelity occurs, it leaves the people connected to the relationship in need of asking critical questions about what has happened, and what comes next. Making sense of adultery Adultery can be complex, in the sense that any two people off the street may not agree on what constitutes infidelity. People come from different religious, ethnic, cultural, and intellectual backgrounds, and they have a broad range of life experiences that have shaped them and how they do life. One person might consider sending a private message on social media to an ex to be problematic, while another person might not. Of course, in a relationship, you’re not dealing with two random people off the street. It’s two people who have been walking alongside one another for some time, and they have been exposed to each other’s understanding of life and the world around them. It is true, though, that sometimes couples make assumptions and never properly discuss what [...]

Do you believe that as time has gone on, your commitment to your partner has grown weaker? Do you want to change that trend? If so, it is helpful to consider the following questions: What does it entail to be faithful to your spouse? What obstacles could jeopardize this dedication? What can you do to make your commitment to your partner stronger? First, let’s look at some basics. What is commitment? What do you think commitment means in a marriage? Many would contend that it results from a sense of obligation. For instance, a couple might decide to stay together for the sake of their kids or out of a sense of obligation to God, the One who created marriage. Such motivations are undoubtedly admirable and will support a marriage during trying times. However, marriage partners must feel more than just a sense of duty toward one another to be content. Jehovah God intended for a marriage to make a couple deeply joyful and content. He wanted a man to rejoice in his wife (Ephesians 5:28, NIV) and he wanted a woman to feel as loved by her husband as he does by his own body. (Proverbs 5:18, NIV) A couple must develop trust to forge that kind of bond. Their ability to form a lifelong friendship is also crucial. A man and woman’s dedication to their marriage will increase as they work to gain each other’s trust and develop the closest of friendships. They will develop a bond that the Bible describes as being so strong that it will feel like “‘…the two will become one flesh.’” (Matthew 19:5, NIV) Therefore, commitment could be compared to the mortar holding together a sturdy house’s bricks. Sand, cement, and water are some of the ingredients used to make mortar. Similar [...]